


Void

by springsunset



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a sad ending, HUHUHUHUHUHU, M/M, i love this ship so much, i love wonshua, im sorry, joshua is mourning, joshua u can do this, pls dont kill me, so much, that shit hurts, this made me cry a lot while writing, u got this, wait gonna cry some more
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2018-11-03
Packaged: 2019-08-16 21:58:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16503461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/springsunset/pseuds/springsunset
Summary: Take my hand, take my whole life, too.





	Void

**Author's Note:**

> hello i'm back to contribute to the WonShua tag with angst... 
> 
> lyrics were from the amazing What A Wonderful World and Can't Help Falling In Love Cover by Reneé Dominique!! check it out [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBIYD3h1olY)!!
> 
> listen to that one while reading the fic for a more complete (read: painful) experience. :)

_"I see trees of green. Red roses, too."_

Joshua sits alone on the first row of the pews, his small, shaking voice the only thing that reverberates in that hollow hall. No one else is there; no priests, no nuns, no friends, no family.

No one.

 

_"I see them bloom, for me and you."_

Yet his eyes are void of life, swollen from all the tears he has shed.

Because the flowers have stopped blooming for them.

 

_"And I think to myself, what a wonderful world."_

How wonderful it could've been. It was supposed to happen today. Everything was going well; they were happy. Their friends were ecstatic. Invitations had been sent out within and outside the country. The wedding had been the talk of the town. It was his grandest dream.

But it's no longer happening.

 

_"I see skies of blue, and clouds of white."_

The sky outside is indeed bright; the brightest he has ever seen in his life. Birds fly by, and the trees and the flowers are vibrant. Life is unfolding right in front of him, yet he feels dead inside.

Because he's gone.

 

_"The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night."_

The memories of the time they spent together flood in his head; of their passionate nights and equally passionate fights. Of the times they almost fell apart yet chose to stay together, because they knew never again would they find the same kind of love that they found with each other.

And after years of loving one another, they agreed to get married on a clear fall day in November.

But everything Joshua had ever dreamed of just vanished, just like how the flames faded with the ember.

 

_"And I think to myself, what a wonderful world."_

Joshua keeps on singing, until he reaches the point where he had to transition to the other song that Wonwoo was supposed to sing. The song Wonwoo loved so much, as it had been his parents' song. And he wanted it to be their song as well.

It was supposed to be Wonwoo's voice; yet it's him who's singing. The absence of Wonwoo's warm, deep voice sends a cold chill down his spine, that Joshua stops singing for a few seconds.

Yet he continues, because if he doesn't, it would be like losing him again.

 

_"Wise men say only fools rush in. But I can't help falling in love with you."_

Wonwoo had been the first one to say 'I love you'. Joshua could remember the faint blush on Wonwoo's cheeks, and the bright smile on his boyfriend's face when he heard the words, "I love you, too."

It was a spring day in May, three years ago, and Joshua wanted to kiss him then and there.

And Joshua wished he did.

Because Wonwoo's kisses were the best.

 

_"Shall I stay? Would it be a sin, if I can't help falling in love with you?"_

At first, of course, they were scared. Both of them knew they were gay before they even knew each other, yet life in South Korea made it hard. But Joshua trusted Wonwoo. And Wonwoo trusted him with his whole heart. And when Joshua watched Wonwoo as he knelt down on one knee one year ago, Joshua knew falling in love with him was the best decision he ever made in his life.

But he never knew it would also be the most painful.

 

 _"Like a river flows surely to the sea._  
_Darling so it goes,_  
_Some things are meant to be."_

Was that meant to be? That rainy day, just a week ago, when Wonwoo's car lost control and hit a post, killing the boy effectively; was it meant to happen?

Is fate really this cruel and ruthless, that it will stab you on the heart repeatedly, and push you into the hollow void six feet under right when you thought you were finally going to be happy?

Joshua didn't want to believe it at first. On that day, when his phone rang, he thought he was going to hear Wonwoo's voice.

Yet it was another person's voice; a man, uttering Wonwoo's name, of his condition, of his location, of his rapidly fading consciousness and pulse.

 

_"Take my hand, take my whole life, too"_

That day, Joshua ran rapidly to the hospital where Wonwoo was pronounced dead on arrival. He held Wonwoo's hands, and they were cold. The hands he loved so much, the hands that gave him so much warmth, the hands that gave him the softest and the most loving touches; they were cold. Joshua wanted to cling onto the slightest trace of life that flowed within Wonwoo's hands, within his body, so he begged. Joshua begged for him to wake up, to not leave him, to stop kidding around, because it's crushing him way beyond what he can handle.

But Wonwoo didn't move. He didn't speak.

The doctors murmured quiet apologies; the staff was ordered to take Joshua out of the room, yet seeing the young man sprawled on the hospital floor, breathless, sobbing, asking for a miracle in the most dire situation, made them take a step back. Everyone then left the room to leave him to mourn.

Joshua can't remember what happened next.

But when he woke up, he was in a hospital bed, the smell of fresh flowers greeting him as he gained consciousness. His mother was there, her eyes soft and loving, but swollen with tears. She held his hand.

And then it sank in.

Wonwoo's gone.

Forever.

And today, Joshua walks the aisle, alone, without a soul to see or to talk to. And he sings their song -- the song they promised to sing together today, on what was supposed to be their wedding day.

 

_"I can't help falling in love... with you."_

He sinks to his knees, and cries.

He lets out the most heart wrenching, loudest sob he had ever let out ever since his death. The tears never stop flowing, and his voice keeps breaking, he begins to feel that his throat would give up on him. He keeps going on, and on, and on; time begins to feel unreal and fluid, as if he is stuck in a vacuum in a universe where air does not exist. He feels like he's leaving his body, and he's transcending into another realm.

And through it all, Wonwoo is the only thing on his mind.

Joshua yearns for a kiss, an embrace, a vision, a voice. He grows more desperate with every passing second. He wants to feel something. Anything.

Anything that has Wonwoo's spirit.

But it never comes.

It's just a void. A hollow, never-ending void.

**Author's Note:**

> IM SORRY FOR THE PAINNNNNNNNN
> 
> UM. PROMPT WAS BY mimimirukuu!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> I FEEL SO SAD WRITING THAT SHIT BUT OFC I GOTTA MAKE IT SADDER. 
> 
> GOD. 
> 
> GOOD NIGHT. 
> 
> I LOVE WONSHUA I'LL WRITE THEM FLUFF SOON
> 
> anyway talk to me!!
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/hongjeons)  
> [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/jeoneonuwu)


End file.
